Random thoughts and musings

As almost everyone I talk to regularly (well, my parents and brothers and sisters...) knows, John will graduate from college soon. In fact, the ceremony will take place in 91 days- as soon as I figure out how to do those cool little countdown widgets, I'll add one. Then all y'all (that's the plural form of y'all- for the non-Texans out there) can help me count down the days until this chapter of our lives is over and done. I am really excited for John to finish school. It has been quite a ride. We have enjoyed ourselves and grown as a couple and as a family. We have been tried and tested; we have had some wonderful times as well as our share of struggles. Overall, though, we have been blessed, and have seen the Lord's hand guiding our path.

Our whole marriage has been a whirlwind. It seems like we were both drifting along through life until we found each other. We got married, 10 months later had Collin, 3 months later I returned to college at EA, 15 months later Cameron joined us, 10 months after that we moved to Texas, within the month John's parents split up, 8 months later Caitlyn was born, 26 months later John's mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer, 3 weeks later I finished my Bachelor's degree, 6 weeks later we lost John's mom, one year and 2 days later Caleigh was born, and 91 days from today John will graduate. It seems like change has been the only constant thing in our marriage. Right now, I am filled with so many emotions. The first phase of our educational journey is drawing to a close, and it is really bittersweet. I am excited because I am ready to start saving for a house, start paying off our 100k in debt (gotta love student loans and credit cards!), and start the next chapter of our lives. At the same time, I am scared because I worry about us finding employment and managing our family as duel earners. We have been blessed (or rather our credit card companies have been blessed) to be able to have me be a "stay at home" parent for the majority of our educational journey. I substitute taught and worked in special ed. at the boys' school last year, but over all I have been a "stay at home" parent, and we have been able to minimize the amount of time our children have spent in daycare. I feel like we have managed to maintain the "balance" between home time and daycare time, and that our children have benefitted from their associations and daycare experiences. At the same time, we have benefitted because John has been able to work full time and attend his classes, and I have been afforded the opportunity to persue my education as well as provide our children with a relatively "stable" home life.

I am about 75% sure we will return to AZ after John's graduation. With both of us returning to the workforce full-time, it will be much easier on our family if we live closer to our extended family. I know the next couple of years will be even busier and crazier than the previous 7, so familial support will be crucial for our children. Hopefully we will be able to work hard, pay off our credit cards, and get into a reasonably priced home. I know we will always "struggle", and probably never have "enough" money, but I also know that in the ways that truly matter, we have been blessed beyond measure. We have 4 beautiful children, we are both college educated, and most importantly, we truly love each other. We are not and will probably never be one of those ooshy-gooshy, lovey-dovey, makes you wanna puke couples- but we have each other's backs and that's what matters =) I'm excited to see what the next 7.5 years brings.